The Ways We Love

December 30, 2008
The Ways We Love
Choosing to Have a Mate or Being Single

The way we choose to love can be as unique as the way we choose to make a living, maintain our health, or entertain ourselves. Some choose to seek out a mate and enter into a partnership with a special individual, while others find immense satisfaction in staying single. There is no right or wrong way to be in your life when it comes to deciding whether or not to be in a relationship, even though society tends to put an emphasis on romantic partnerships. Whether you choose to go through life as part of a romantic relationship or live as a single unit, there are benefits to both. Feel free to be comfortable with whatever choice is right for you.

Choosing to be single is a wonderful way to spend time discovering yourself. You have more time and space to figure out what and how you want your life to be without having to keep someone else’s choices in mind. Being single gives you the freedom to do what you want at a moment’s notice and the pride that comes with facing life on your own terms. Companionship, support, and affection can be found while spending quality time with friends, colleagues, and relatives. There is also the fun that comes with being able to date many different people without having to make a commitment. Choosing to have a mate, on the other hand, brings with it an opportunity to share your life with another person. There is comfort in the knowledge that you are facing the world with someone as a united front. When life is challenging, you are in a position to strengthen, as well as give each other comfort. There is also the inevitable transformation of self that comes from allowing another person t! o so intimately be a part of your life.

Remember that what is right for one person may not be right for another, and people can transition between wanting to be with another person and wanting to be alone many times over the course of their lives. Whether you seek out a mate or live the single life, embracing it fully will ensure that either choice is as fulfilling as possible for you.

source: DailyOm.com

"Serbis"

New Filipino films challenge status quo

By Jonathan Landreth

Nov 10, 2008, 01:16 PM ET

Corrected: Nov 10, 2008, 04:21 PM ET

NEW YORK -- The crumbling Manila movie theater at the center of director Brillante Mendoza's indie film "Serbis" could be a body-double for Filipino moviemaking.

"But no, please, don't say that," protests Yam Laranas, another director, whose just-completed Hollywood remake of his own 2004 horror film "Sigaw" signals a possible new career path for Filipino artists.

"There's also a new breed coming up with new styles and techniques and adapting to new ways of getting out there," Laranas, 39, says over the phone from Manila.

Remakes? New techniques? It's about time for a second coming because making movies for the largely Catholic audience in the Southeast Asian nation of 90 million people hasn't paid much to more than a few lucky filmmakers for at least 10 years.

Even celebrity-obsessed Filipinos now wait months to watch movies on TV or cable. In the global recession, they're sure to snap up first-run films on pirated DVDs for 30 Philippine Pesos ($0.63) rather than splurge tickets costing four times as much.

According to the Motion Picture Association of America, which -- at last check in 2005 -- estimated 78% of the discs sold in the Philippines were bootlegs, Filipino cinema owners are the worst offenders in Asia for failing to stop illegal camcording. "We stand by these numbers today," an MPA official says.

These days, the Philippines releases fewer than 50 mainstream films a year into its cinemas, down from nearly 300 a year during the heyday of the 1970s and '80s. By the early 1990s, when a spate of bomb scares at shopping malls scatteredmoviegoers, the industry was in a tailspin.

Rising as fast as the industry around him collapsed, 48-year-old "Dante" Mendoza, (many Filipinos take nicknames to shorten long, formal Christian names), took "Serbis," his seventh film, to Cannes in May. The film, set in a rundown family-owned cinema whose owners, to make ends meet, resort to showing skin flicks to crowds of gay hustlers, didn't win but it did sell: Fortissimo Films rapidly cut deals for distribution in Canada, France, Israel, the Benelux countries and the U.S. -- even though it was barely seen in the Philippines.

There, screens are dominated by Filipino-language comedies and John Hughes-style teenybopper movies, most of which get a run for their money from Hollywood films in English, the nation's fluent second tongue.

Indeed, the MPA doesn't complain about Filipino market barriers. Film imports aren't capped as they are in China and local movie houses often favor Hollywood blockbusters made for hundreds of millions of dollars over even the biggest local films. The average local budget is less than 35 million pesos ($728,000).

Refusing to call the glass half empty, Laranas says that, after 300 years "in the convent" (under Spanish rule) and 45 years "under Hollywood's spell" (as a U.S. colony until 1946), the storytelling culture of The Philippines now faces a new opportunity.

"In terms of canvas and the medium, it's all changed. New filmmakers will eventually become the mainstream, changing the story as they go," says Laranas, whose real name is William.

Paving the way for part of this new wave was Cinemalaya, a local film festival held in Manila each July for the last four years. ("Malaya" means "freedom" in Tagalog, the dominant Filipino dialect).

Funded by TV and cable station owner Tony "Boy" Cojuangco and the Film Development Council of the Philippines, Cinemalaya grants each winning project 200,000 pesos ($4,178).

Early Cinemalaya selection committee member and judge "Manet" Dayrit says most projects are made by a crew of friends for less than 2 million pesos ($41,000). She says their quality has risen rapidly each year.

However, Dayrit, the managing director of Roadrunner Network, the Philippines' largest post-production house (in turn owned by Star Cinemas, the biggest studio), cautions that aspirants to Mendoza's fast path to glory could be disappointed.

"Young, fresh filmmakers are making digital movies with a new outlook and without a formula," she says. "Trouble is, most of them still lack distributors and a real market locally or overseas. They may be capturing the imagination at film festivals, but as a business, we still have to figure this out."

An optimist, Laranas still allows "99% of the movies in the resurgence are of low technical quality, presenting real problems for overseas distributors." "Sigaw" (and now its remake "The Echo") is one of the lucky ones. It was inspired by a real-life murder in Laranas' Manila apartment building. He says it made back four times its $300,000 budget at the domestic boxoffice and then "more than paid back its budget" again when No. 2 Filipino studio, Regal Entertainment, sold remake rights to Roy Lee and RightOff Entertainment in Los Angeles.

Elsewhere, Chris Martinez, 37, won the audience award at the Pusan International Film Festival in October with his directorial debut, "100." Unlike the escapist scripts he'd written with names like "Bridal Shower" and "Bikini Open," "100" chronicles a cancer patient going through her list of things to do before she dies. Still, the movie is a celebration, Martinez says on the phone from Manila.

Martinez says he has nothing against the Filipino stories that do well at foreign film festivals that exoticize and romanticize poverty, but wants the world to know that his country has "other stories away from the slums and squatter areas."

Though Martinez hopes "100" is the first Filipino indie to succeed in telling a story about Manila's middle, educated, financially comfortable class, the film hasn't yet made any money. Still, he feels that audiences have liked it for its perceived variety.

"They must have been shocked to see that we too love Haagen Dazs, travel to Disneyland and drive SUVs," Martinez said.

But what an audience finds entertaining is different all over the world and isn't guaranteed to travel. As such, Wouter Barendrecht, Fortissimo Films co-chairman, says that "Serbis" was sold not as a Filipino film but rather as a film by Brillante Mendoza. So-called "passport sales," made on the director's nationality, can only be made once or twice, he says.

Noting that many Filipino dramas are sobby, three-hanky affairs, Barendrecht says, "If you're Meryl Streep, in the West you win an Oscar for crying without tears. In Southeast Asia, the dry-cry is not appreciated. This can be a commercial handicap."

Hence, even when a film like "Serbis" lands big-territory distribution it still isn't guaranteed to make bundles. Regent Films will release "Serbis" in New York and L.A. in Spring 2009, targeting Filipinos, film buffs and, says Mark Reinhart, the gay community, which "should help the film a lot." Still, Reinhart says, referring to the leading art house cinema chains in the U.S., "The Laemmles and the Landmarks will take it, but I don't think it will go much further."

The Hollywood Reporter

BAMBU Stuff!

(mental note: must get back to blogging regularly!)



New video out soon too! Excited!!


Bambu "Crooks & Rooks" Teaser from Kid Heroes on Vimeo.

yes it's been a while. but this, i must.

just taking a quick breather from the trabajo, to commemorate this day, 7 years ago, when i couldn't even speak as i watched what was happening on TV.

Let's Not Forget 9-11-No Really Let's Not Ever Forget

by Davey D

As we come upon the 7th anniversary of 9-11 I found myself wanting to run far, far away from all the media pageantry, celebration and fanfare. I don't wanna see another retrospective TV special designed to pull my heartstrings and yet not sooth my soul. It's apparent that the goal of these mass media outlets is to garner ratings and NOT use their vast resources to heal any of the people who were traumatized by that day's events.


I realize that so many of us have forgotten just how shook up we were on September 11th 2001. So many of us forgot how we initially thought up to 50 thousand people have died when those towers collapsed and for the most part the world came to a stand still on that sunny day in September. In many people's minds, what took place was beyond comprehensible. How could this happen? How could this happen on our soil? Those were the questions so many of us asked? I'm still not sure if they've been fully answered to this day.


I remember shortly after 9-11 it led to people going all out and showing compassion to one another as so many of us at least for a brief moment were reminded that no one is promised tomorrow and that it was important to take some time out, be patient and show kindness. For weeks and even months after the tragedy, you could still smell the smoke throughout New York and it wasn't unusual to see somebody just break down and start crying in the middle of the streets. People seemed to understand and would show love and concern.


I remember going down to Ground Zero for the first time in early November. It was at night and seemed so eerie. The pungent oder, the mammoth pieces of twisted metal, the emptiness of that area was something you could never forget. If you were from New York then you really felt it because the WTC was such a fixture not just to our skyline but also to what we many of us envisioned when you said New York.


September 11 was so traumatizing for folks, that I saw hardened thugs sharing kind words and hugging cops who lost many of their own that day.
Even with the ghost of an unarmed Amadou Diallo and 41 shots just two or three years behind them people still reached out and showed love. I saw American flags being waved from rooftops and windows from hood to the burbs and not because we all found some sort xenophobic American pride, but because that flag was the only thing we had that symbolized our collective desire to connect to one another.


I recall shortly after 9-11 the Hip Hop community coming out.
We had Dr Dre donating one million dollars to the victims relief fund.
He and Eminem were working on a song that brought heat to Osama Bin Laden. In fact I recall Dre being on Fox 5 in New York spitting some incendiary lyrics. The song never came out. I'm not quite sure why.


I recall the Hip Hop has a Heart program they had on Hot 97 where all sorts of artists from Wu-Tang on down gave lots of money.
I recall Wu-Tang donating money.
I recall Naughty By Nature doing a fundraiser for the families of slain firefighters at Roseland.
I recall Jay-Z wrapping himself up in the flag and taking a picture while MC Hammer did a song for the troops.
I recall Canibus demanding that he be drafted to go fight. he later went and volunteered. I recall cats wearing red, white and blue doo rags talking about they're thugging for America.
I also recall artists like Mr Lif, J-Live, Jahi and the Life and so many others who sparked off songs about 9-11.


I recall Jermaine Dupri and a number of other artists including Christina Aguliera, Questlove, the Backstreet Boys, Mary J, Blige, Bono, Destiny’s Child, Fred Durst, Eve, Nelly Furtado, Nona Gaye (Marvin’s daughter), Ja Rule, Wyclef Jean, Alicia Keys, Aaron Lewis (of Staind), Lil’ Kim, Jennifer Lopez, Nas, Nelly, NSYNC, P.
Diddy, Britney Spears and Gwen Stefani just to name a few, had did a remake of Marvin Gaye's classic jam song 'What's Going On?'. The song was intended to bring attention to Aids in Africa, and had just been completed a few days before 9-11.
Another verse was added and the song then went out to aid the families of the 9-11

The world poured its heart out to us 7 years ago because back then we realized that ALL of us died on 9-11. It wasn't just the crying suburban housewives wives who lost their husbands that day or chisel jawed all American fire fighters who lost their colleagues who are seemingly the only one's shown and whose stories are told on these manipulative TV networks.


I remember all those undocumented Mexican restaurant workers who perished that day and because they were using fake names their families never got benefits. I recall that there were a number of Muslims who perished but because it was Muslims who were the hijackers we somehow want to keep Muslims dehumanized so they can all be scapegoated.


There were single moms, brothers who were just barely making it, elderly Puerto Ricans, Asian folks, disabled, Native Americans, gays, straights and people from 59 different countries from Cuba to Canada to China and all around the world who all died in those towers and on those jets that crashed into the Pentagon and that field in Pennsylvania. My home boy's elderly Puerto Rican uncle perished that day, unfortunately his tale never makes the TV specials-probably because he didn't work at a fancy law firm nor fit the bill of the type of person who needs to be showcased to satisfy so called Middle American viewers.


Hell, let's be honest-seven years after 9-11, it has become a mass media event designed to satisfy the misguided whims of soccer now turned 'hockey' moms who want us all wearing flag pins. Healing and coming to terms with those real life losses isn't really on the table. Ground Zero is not grave site, which interestingly enough is built upon a slave grave site, but instead its now become a mandated political pit stop for high profile politicians seeking to show the world just how 'American' they are.


Today as we commemorate the 7th anniversary, senators Barack Obama and John McCain will show up to Ground Zero this afternoon and try to look presidential. They're gonna stand there and look all somber and try to show concern when really their visit is just one big photo op.


They say they are putting all politics aside for today, but their visit is nothing but political. Sure they may not snipe at one another, but they are only there to woo the people.
I have to raise the question were any of those men out and about touching lives before today's 9-11 event? Did they show up in years past to this grave site to show their compassion? Have they ever called any of the families outside of today's festivities just to offer a soothing word, a helping hand or to simply say that their concern goes beyond politics or is their appearance designed to satisfy people who weren't really victims but somehow wanna 'own and redefine 9-11?

I guess the word is out that if you play your cards right an appearance at Ground Zero can do wonders for your political career.
Just ask George Bush and former NY Mayor Rudy Giuliani.
I'm still wondering how a day that was so tragic for so many got pimped to the point that an unpopular president who still had people salty at him for stealing an election just 9 months earlier and an even more unpopular mayor who was on his way to his political grave, managed to become the sole faces of it.


When 9-11 comes around I never ever forget how those two uncaring men came around and used their position and influence for political and material gain. The former New York mayor has a popular international consulting firm where he shows other countries like El Salvador the types of steps they need to take to fight terrorism.


In the case of George Bush can we say Iraq? 9-11 was his long awaited excuse to go wage war in the middle east. No matter what the so called media pundits and experts espouse, I am convinced that man at the very least, had prior knowledge.
Like Jadakiss said in his song 'Bush knocked down the towers'.
Am I the only one who recalls then San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown stating during an interview that he had been warned not to fly that day?

Bay Area artists Paris who was among the first to do a song calling out the Bush and his Neo-Con friends within PNAC (Project for the New American Century) for the role they played in 9-11.
He painstakingly noted in his landmark song 'What Would You Do?', how Bush and company were hoping for a Pearl Harbor-like event and used 9-11 to carry out their game plan to exude global military influence around the world. The War in Iraq was first on the list.


We need to remember that when we think of 9-11.


We need to never forget how Bush and his cronies played upon everyone's emotions shortly after 9-11 and took people's desire to connect and our collective anxiousness and flipped it into a political witch hunt. I remember vividly how everyone's patriotism was suddenly called into question especially if you were in media, an artists, a professor or speaking from the pulpit. If you raised questioned there were political attack dogs on you..

If you was in media and you spoke out calls were made and pressure was put on those who owned those outlets to either silence you or let you go.
I know I fell victim to it at Clear Channel, Comedian Bill Maher fell victim to it with his show Politically Incorrect on ABC.
Professor Ward Churchill was fired from his post in Denver just last year because of his remarks around 9-11.


San Francisco Pastor and former SF Supervisor Amos Brown caught all kinds of hell when he dared raise the question 'What did we (America) do that 9-11 happened'?
He and other pastors including senator Barack Obamas' former pastor Jeremiah Wright as recently as April of this year caught hell for speaking out and raising questions about 9-11.


There were two newspaper columnist who were hounded out of their jobs by right wing Bushites when they wrote unfavorable columns.
Hell I even recall the host of Rap City getting mad at Chuck D for raising questions about 9-11. The list is along one for people who caught hell.


We should never forget the viciousness that was directed at Oakland Congresswoman Barbara Lee who days after 9-11 was the only one with enough sense and courage to say 'No' to George Bush when he asked for a what amounted to a blank check to fight the this new War on Terror.


I remember how Boots and the Coup came underfire because their album cover which was released 6 months prior to 9-11 showed the World Trade being blown up.


The pressure to conform and heed Bush's assertion 'either your for us or against us' was hard for many especially those who talked to the masses to stand up to.


I remember attending a rally in Snow Park in Oakland the day after 9-11.
It was put on by the folks from Lets Get Free which was designed to call attention to all the Muslims and Arab brothers and sisters who were suddenly catching hell because of the tragedy.
I remember one of the organizer Jamani raising questions about our foreign policy decisions and whether or not it led to the attacks. I remember the issue was raised about our refusal to attend the racism summit in Durbon South Africa which was just days before the 9-11 tragedy and how that came across as us being arrogant.


I recall Michael Franti and the late poet June Jordan doing heartfelt poems and songs that called upon us to keep our humanity in check. Even though 9-11 had just happened, Franti noted how he could feel the pressure to really morph this into something that would have long term political implications. As for Jordan, it was sadly the last time I would see or hear her do a piece. She died a few months later.


There are lots of things to remember about 9-11. There were a lot of people who needlessly suffered that day. There was alot of political manipulation that took place in the aftermath. There are those who have done their best to make us forget what this day is really about.


By smiling and repeating a lie over and over and over again until it becomes truth, 9-11 went from being a day in which were humbled and came back showing a bit more concern and passion to being a propaganda piece and rallying tool for war mongers. There were lives lost that day, lets not lose sight of that. Lets make sure those who suffered are healed.

A. D. T.

ADT stands for "Advanced Diva Training," which the homegirls and me attended Saturday night at the Hollywood Bowl, conducted by Ms. Diva Supreme, Diana Ross. It was a fun night of music, memories and laughter.

First off, I've got to say that shows at the Bowl are one of the true "LA Experiences." Earlier this year I caught Jigga and Mary J, as well as the Playboy Jazz Festival, which closed out with Herbie Hancock. Fabulous. Folks skew a little bougie, but there is a spectrum of folks that come out, bringing their wine, gourmet Trader Joe's or Whole Foods picnic fare... some even try to get romantic with it by laying a blanket out on the concrete with a battery operated candle stick. uh, yeah we were like, umm.... ok... i THINK that's cute....

The girls and I were checking out the latest in picnic basket and portable cooler styles, particularly impressed by the slim cooler:

Easy to carry, and fits easily under one's seat. I am however still trying to get my brother to get me this, from his work:


...because a diva should be efficient and stylish in her picnic gear - NOT carrying around beat up plastic bags, or heavy-ass coolers that take forever to put on the ramp and annoying everyone trying to get up to their seats. And then where are you going to put it when you sit down? Block the aisle? In large venues, be respectful of shared space. It's a pet peeve of mine when people don't get that.

Anyways, I digress. On with the program.

Let's start off on a quick definition of a "diva." We can go on forever discussing this topic, but we won't, because this time around it's not that serious. Like I said, the girls and I had fun last night!

The word "diva" is derived from the Italian "dea," or "goddess." It is also the term used for female opera singers, and over time has come to describe women of strong presence. Whether it be sexuality, sensuality, speaking her mind or breaking social mores, there are both negative and positive connotations to what "strong presence" may convey. In present society and culture, by merely having a strong presence, women go against the role that this male-dominated society attempts to chain us with - subservience, meekness, demonization even...

In books and articles I've read, back in ancient times, women were honored and revered, as the bearers of life, as intellectuals, as leaders. I wonder where those times have gone, though I can't wonder too much or else I get left behind, buried... constantly feeling like I have to prove myself to get the respect that men automatically get. And then, add on to that, being a woman of color? ...ok. I'll save that for another post.

Diva. Some women shirk from the thought of being called one, because of those stereotypical negative connotations - obnoxious, entitled, bitchy, bossy... it can make life more difficult to get through as a woman. But hey, guys are like that all the time!

For me, those icons referred to as divas, usually fascinate me. Sometimes I feel sad because they seem like they are just a slave to their own fabricated image. However, many of them have taken charge of their image, not caring what other think, have built their own enterprises, and don't depend on a man to take care of them. Complex as it is, there is a sense of empowerment there.

So let's take, case and point, self-professed diva, Diana Ross.
"It takes a long time to get to be a diva. I mean, you gotta work at it." -Diana Ross

Some notable "diva" moves - One of the top singers of all time, she has 18 #1 songs (tied with the Beatles), led the legendary Supremes and has garnered numerous awards; did not show up to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction for the Supremes; went on a short-lived Supremes reunion tour without the original members.

So, we got the chance to enjoy an evening with the diva herself. An evening of lightheated, unbridled diva fun. Some notes we took from Lady Supreme:

Diva Lesson #1: RED is the diva color.

So Gerlie, Anna and I tried to guess what color dress she will come out with. Gerlie said yellow and orange, I said black, and Anna said purple and gold (go Lakers!). We unanimously agreed that she will have a minimum of three wardrobe changes. We were all wrong.

I think we all secretly wanted to guess red, but that would be too predictable. But hey, I guess there is no way around it. Come out big and bold. Opening song? You guessed it. "I'm Coming Out"

Also to note in the photo above - we termed this pose, "Diva Pose #1" - arms outstretched as if she is embracing her audience. Also a little... messianic. That part's kinds weird.

Diva Lesson #2: Let the people know why you are the Diva that you are.

All divas have their claim to fame. For Ms Ross, it's her string of hit songs that you don't even realize you know the lyrics to. She rolled them out - Baby Love, Where Did Our Love Go, You Can't Hurry Love, and of course...

....yes indeed! She continued on with Love Hangover, Do You Know Where You're Going To, Endless Love solo - she did both parts of the duet. This song brings back memories of me and my mom singing it together when I was like six years old. She ended the night with the original independent women's anthem, "I Will Survive."

Diva Lesson #3: You don't have to do an encore if you don't want to.

Maybe it was the Bowl's rule that she end at the time, but even with a standing ovation and cheers from the crowd, she called it a night after the last song. But hey that's cool. Rather that then her singing some "song from her new album." Let's face it, it's about her past work, not her latest album.

Diva Lesson #4: Bell sleeves rock!

(wardrobe change #2)

I couldn't find a photo of her doing diva pose #1 with the bell sleeves, but it just looked hot. Classic, majestic even.

Diva Pose #2:

(wardrobe change #3)

ok so it's more like DP #1.5, but it's about shoulders back, chest out, and one leg in front of the other, for the mermaid effect

diva pose #3: play with your hair a little bit


diva pose #4, the finale: diva pose #1 with a kiss and wave

(final wardrobe change)

Indeed a fun time. (read: don't take this too seriously. Sequins and tulle are NOT my thing) G, Anna, Evie and Daisy - thank you for the food, spirits and laughter!

Funny How Time Flies...

...when you're working!

I'm suuuper excited about my two labors of love. Here is a photo that captures them together:

(photo credit: Ernie Pena)

September is going to fun!!! Just letting y'all know ahead of time... =)

SAVE THE DATES!

SEPTEMBER 6-7, 2008 - the 17th Annual Festival of Philippine Arts and Culture - Pt. Fermin Park, CA

SEPTEMBER 2008 - EXACT CHANGE - BAMBU'S THIRD SOLO ALBUM and West Coast Tour

Will have more details as they come along! and TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

it's not all bad. just be careful.

Mercury retrograde

May 26 - June 19, 2008

Here we go again... Mercury goes retrograde once again. It happens 3 times a year and it lasts for about 3 weeks. This time is from May 27 to June 19, 2008. Then from September 24 to October 15, 2008 and then from January 11, 2009 to February 1, 2009.

This is an important period, and we should be aware of the effects associated with this astrological influence. Since it is so often, we must learn what it means and how to take advantage of it.

Astronomical background

There is no real backwards movement of Mercury; it's just that we see it this way from Earth, because of the combined movement of the Earth and Mercury around the Sun. However, astrologically this is very relevant.

General influence of Mercury retrograde

Mercury rules over the mind's processes, studying, communication, businesses, travels and the like. When Mercury reverses its direction, all these areas are affected as well.

The mind turns naturally inwards and people tend to analyze more the own thoughts and follow the common thinking patterns, rather then be curious and eager of new intellectual experiences or challenges. This helps the meditation or the thorough lonely long-term study of a specific matter, but it affects the study of new subjects, the communication with the others, the attention oriented outwards.

Businesses, travels and communications tend to experience delays and different problems. Computers and other processes that work with information may experience crashes, unexpected failures.

Don't enroll to courses, don't buy expensive Mercurian items (books, cars, mobile phones etc.), don't sign important contracts and do not marry.

What is this Mercury retrograde period good for?

It is definitely a very good period for some actions. No time is completely bad for anything, there is a reason in everything happens.

The key is the reversed direction of movement: take any known Mercurian action, reverse its flow, consider the keywords "re-doing something", "double-checking", "finish the old projects" and there you are, you've found the good side of Mercury retrograde.

For instance, you may want to read again a book you particularly liked, a subject you studied before, meet and discuss with old friends you haven't met for a long time, travel to places you've already been to before.

This is an excellent time to work on old projects that never got to be finished. So, think about the things you started and never finalized.

Next, you might wish to prevent any bad things to happen to you: so double-check your agenda, call your business partners to confirm that everything goes as planned, have everything ready before the deadline and leave some extra time for unexpected events. Make copies of your important files and documents, save your work more often.

The other solution is to go on vacation or at least slow down the pace of your projects. You will find that going slowly during the Mercury retrograde period will spare you many efforts of redoing the same action that wasn't performed right the first time.

Above all, be generous and compassionate: you are already aware about the influence of this period, but the others aren't aware of it or there may be uncontrollable events. That's why you should have more diligence with the others and give them some more time. It'll be your mental health that you'll be sparing actually.

- astrologyweekly.com

Move & Shake It, Girl!

...with her SMARTS and HARD WORK, that is! =)

One of my good friends and colleagues, Rona Mercado, was just featured on sohh.com.

click on pic to read

Entertainment can be a sharky biz. So stand-up folks like Ro are true gems. Constantly on-the-grind as well as spiritually grounded, she ROCKS!

Happy Hump Day

May 7, 2008
Fulfilling Energetic Investments
Focusing Our Energy

As modern life makes a wealth of information and opportunities available to us, we may find ourselves torn between a wide variety of interests and projects. Our excitement may entice us to try all of them at once, but doing so only diffuses our energy, leaving us unable to fully experience any of them. Like an electrical socket with too many things plugged into it, we may be in danger of overheating and burning out. But if we can choose one thing at a time to focus all of our attention upon, we can make the most of our life-force energy, engaging ourselves fully in the moment so that it can nurture us in return.

Our attention can be pulled in many directions, not only in our own lives, but by advertising, media, and the hustle and bustle of our surroundings. But when we take the time to listen to our inner guidance and focus our thoughts on the goals that resonate the most strongly within us, the rest of the world will fade away. This may mean focusing the spotlight of our attention upon developing one aspect of our work, one course of study, or one hobby to pursue in our free time, but it doesn’t mean that we have to stay focused on only one thing forever. We may never know which of our interests is best suited to our abilities and heart’s desires unless we give it a proper chance. By being fully present with all that we are and all that we have, we can experience each choice fully and make the most fulfilling choices for our energetic investments.

Because we are multi-faceted beings, we are perpetually involved in many aspects of life in every moment. Our work in the world is necessary to attend to our physical needs, and our relationships are important for our emotional needs, but when we engage our spirit as well, we can choose the area that will nurture body, mind and soul. Staying focused in each moment allows us move with the rhythmic flow of the universe and harmonize all aspects of our being into balanced whole.

dailyom

weekend wrap-up - "thank you and you're welcome"

ok, i'm still waking up. it was so dang hot last night! made it difficult to sleep. had to apologize to my sweetie in the morning for being a brat.

so i thought i'd go into allll this great detail and make my weekend sound realll interesting... but i'll just cut straight to the point - it was a great weekend. i coulda and shoulda took photos to post up, but hey, life is what's happening when you're too dang busy, or into it, to think about documenting it.

that's why i love my writer homies, my filmmaker homies, my documentarian homies... how the hell do y'all do that so well??

landed in vegas and was swooped up by the homies pab and 'nilo, and treated to some cupcakes and red mango frozen dessert. much to their dismay, i prefer red mango over pinkberry. then we met up with the rest of their homies, they checked into their party hotel of choice, the hard rock. nice poolside view i'm sure they enjoyed the rest of the weekend =)

then over to my party hotel of choice, the red rock. super sexy. i'm definitely staying there again! let's just say, i applaud the architects and interior desginers of the hotel, particularly the rooms, for making it ergonomically correct for ... debaucherous fun and games!

the homies made their way into the show... i needed to catch my breath, eat something, and settle into the evening. so i did all that, and it ended up being perfect timing, because my partner-in-crime for the weekend arrived, and we strolled into the show.

i didn't catch lupe and nerd. it's ok, i've seen them twice before, and if i didn't relax and settle in i would have been one bitchy feline for the rest of the night. i was even nice when a drunk white girl fell on my dude, "ohmygosh you are sooo lucky he's tall and handsome and strong... " insisting she didn't need her boyfriend's help who was somewhere over there to get around. lol. aaaanyways...

kanye was amazing and entertaining. he was like a hip hop lukeskywalker/outer space loner trying to make sense of the world as someone who is supposed to save something. (ok someone was trying to tell me what the whole premise/theme of the show was... but i don't remember. i'll look it up later and add it in when i have time. or if you know, please post a comment. thank you (and you're welcome)

the stage set up was the inside of the control station of a spaceship, and it talked back to him, kinda like how Jem (of Jem and the Holograms) had Synergy. there were these large video panels that had pretty dope graphics, the landscapes and the skyscapes were my favorite.

oh and yeah - he's the only one on stage. no DJ, no band, no backup singers, no hype man. just kanye. which, i do applaud him for - he carried it on HIS OWN. no one to foil and make him look sexier or shinier. but at least a DJ woulda been nice to see. the sound was amazing. oh and the stage had an angle/slant to it, so i could see him from where i was standing! see, a short person like me usually just accepts that, at a SRO show, i will only hear the music and see the stage via the video. good lookin out for the (literal) shorties!

he started with "good morning," which i love. i do play that in the morning because well, it captures morning time energy very well. lol it's easy to enjoy his show because his songs are so catchy and you sing and dance along and it's just a good time.

i don't remember the order of the songs. was in the moment. and, pleasantly inebriated. totally present in the moment, i didnt bother remembering such details so diligently. i remember, in no particular order... jesus walks, all falls down, through the fire, can't tell me nothing, good life! flashing lights, stronger ... and more. ended with touch the sky =)

but dang i wish i brought my camera! they didnt even frisk me! oh well. it let me enjoy just being there, and not think about what i should blog about.

i wonder if the kanye troopers scour the net to remove photos of the show, because i didn't find any. but then again, maybe i'm not looking hard enough. oh well.

we just sang along and drank along happily. it was a great time.

friday stumbled into saturday, and it was just pleasant. i wish the r&r could have lasted a little longer, but it was just right.

i got home, and switched right to community member mode. SIPA anniversary banquet, which always has it's fun points.

ok this is already long. i'll continue it later....

the LVD in LV!

(sorry for the failed attempt at a witty title. this time we'll settle for corny.)



I'll be heading to vegas to check out kanye west at the red rock in vegas! woo hoo! Fortunately some rooms opened up so need to deal with traffic and the brouhaha of the Strip. aahh it was meant to be... lol

this is where you'll find me

I am a big fan of Kanye's. A few of my hip hop homies lightweight hate on him because he's "obnoxious" and that turns them off. But you know what... he's one talented dude. And I can't wait to watch him put on a show.

Also looking forward to NERD - the group led by by husband and cousin (i'm pulling the "all filipinos are related" card here).

Big thanks to my homie Pab for hookin' it up!!! See ya and the homies soon man.

ttyl. have a good weekend!

happy earth day!

as a marketer it's interesting to see how "going green" is a recurring "trend." i mean, it's a good trend to have i guess, since it gets people to think twice about being wasteful. even though we still drink out of water bottles and deplete our fossil fuel supply... oh the contradictions we live...but hey, adding some cuteness to a little earthly responsibility certainly doesn't seem like a bad thing...

my little contribution?

i got one as a present for my birthday. i have shopping bags from whole foods and trader joe's, but i always forget them, even though i put them next to the door. but this cute lil thing rolls up and fits in my purse! visit their site to get yours! they have some pretty cute designs.

another reason to love jigga ...

... he chose a dope tour DJ. 5th platooner neil armstrong.

click on the pic to read the LA Times article

ok so i'm hella late in finding this out... thank you to djswerve for informing me! lol

another reminder that i need to keep up better with music and community goings-on (especially since i manage this one foo), beyond dale and miz malubay. even though dale is growing on me.

so this lil news brightened my day. i love it when pin@ys are doing their thing! especially in hip hop, in entertainment, because i swim in those sharky waters and it is not a nice always wade in the pool.

so anyways, yay neil!

(switching ipod to WarmFuzzy mixtape)

Heart of the City.

So last night i was at the hollywood bowl for the maryjblige/jay-z show. And what a show it was!

The homies convened by my office around 630ish so we could just cab it up to the Bowl. The Hollywood Bowl is probably my favorite outdoor concert venue. Nestled in the Hollywood Hills, its natural ampitheatre shape along with its trademark layered bandshell makes for great sound under the stars. Something about it is so pretty and romantic (watch 80s classic Some Kind of Wonderful) I've been fortunate to experience some amazing performances here, from greats such as Miles Davis, Wynton Marsalis, Cassandra Wilson ... saw Lauryn Hill here as well, while she was at the beginning of her transitionary phase... is was o-k... but anyways, I digress.

So the Bowl is home to the LA Philharmonic, the Playboy Jazz Festival (my parents used to go when box seats were affordable), some KCRW joints... (read: bougie) It's rare that hip-hop comes to this venue (trying to remember the last one). So when the announcement was made that MJB and Hov were touring (!) and coming to this venue (!!) it was an automatic must-see.

So the homies (my roll-dogs from UCLA Guthrie house days) and I got together some food, drink, and cabbed it up as far as we could go, jumped out, trekked it up that dang hill - thank god i wore sneakers - and got our butts in our seats just as the house lights came down. I guess i could say they were just waiting for me to arrive ... LOL. Anyways, house lights came down, stage lights and the music came up, to reveal the full band, an orchestra, and an immense gfx screen. At the top of the set stood Jay and Mary - tux'ed out, sleek, dapper. Ana turned to me and said, "hip hop has grown up."

Indeed. The crowd went wild, and they opened with "Can't Knock the Hustle," of course. Mary took over from there, jumping into her classics, like Real Love, Sweet Thing...

ok. I'm not going to go into the whole show in detail, because well, you just had to be there really... and I was pretty tipsy so I don't think I remember everything in chronological order... it was a great show. Jay was a-mazing. All the hits... all the ones about his name... teased the crowd with a few Beyonce beats (oh gawd)...

now the big banger, literally, was that the show ended in fireworks. now, they usually have fireworks on July 4th sync'd with the Philharmonic. I coudl picture Jay in a meeting with the producers going, fuck it we're at the Bowl. Let's do as the symphony does. Super flashy Hollywood. But hey, it was a SHOW. indeed. i had a great time.

attempted to cab it back to our cars, but we ended up just walking (off the liqs). all good. i think it was faster than those waiting in stack parking.

Los Angeles - with every event there is going to be a comment about traffic and driving. but where else could you watch a show like that, under the stars on an april night with crisp breezes, and your homies? =)

sunday, lovely sunday... wish you were here

Sometimes it's a blessing when things don't go exactly as planned. On Sunday morning i ended up in Manhattan Beach with my homegirls, and met new homegirls! Oh my gosh it was lovely. My roomie gave me 10 minutes to put on a suit, throw stuff in a bag, and be on our way. We were laid out on the scorching SoCali sand by 10:30. The water was hella cold, but that's ok. Given the season it shouldn't have even been that hot (frikkin global warming), so it's ok that that water temp didn't catch up.

Hungry by 1pm, so we ate at Local Yolk, home of some of the best banana muffins i've ever tasted (can i get a muffin in that stick of butter?) and then just perused the boutiques in the area.

And just as we were wrapping it up, i get a text from my old roomies... BBQ at their pad! perfect timing. Made a quick stop for some ice cream and sugar cones, headed east to Dena and had a lovely time talking shit and making more new friends.

what more i ask for... a beautiful day to relax, with beautiful energy surrounding me.

i've made a conscious effort not to blog about work, because y'all out there have your own to deal with, why would you want to hear about my biz. and why would i want to let you in on propietary info anyways? =) plus it's nice to remember these moments and reread them, when it does get hectic and i gotta breathe....

Saturday was lovely as well! Woke up to sweet loveliness, got my am workout on, and then met up with my komadre and my fellow ninang for dinner and a girls' night out. it was fun just to be out with the ladies =). repeat is a must!

Have a good rest of the week!

Friday Four-Eleven

It's a gorgeous day in LA. Mid-to-high 80's today. Not a cloud in the sky...

And today's date is special to me - it signifies one of my key physical characteristics (my height!), it's my business name.

I'm proclaiming it a holiday! even though... i'm at the office...!!!

But it's ok, actually. Yesterday after work i hung out with the boss, ex-coworkers, and later in the evening, my mentor and folks i've met through the "industry, " but most importantly, they are all wonderful friends. i woke up thinking this morning, how cool is it that these good folks have come into my life. In this business of Hollywood, which can get stressful and sharky and cutthroat, they certaintly make it more pleasant.

ok, pause on the gloating, back to work! =)

any ideas on how i should signify this holiday for future 4/11's?

on a sunday afternoon...

This past Sunday my brother and i had a picnic at our childhood neighborhood park to celebrate our birthdays. It was so lovely. It was a little cool, but no rain! yay! Our (not so) baby brother got there at 7am to save the spot. Good look on that!

A whole bunch of friends and fam came through. At first I had second thoughts about a picnic, cuz why would folks do that for my old ass! But when my brothers brought it up how could I resist. Aunties, uncles, cousins, homies, and the kids all made it such a lovely time.

I don't have any pictures because I didn't charge the battery beforehand. Doh! So I'll grab photos from my dad and my bro's lady. In the meantime, check out my girl Michelle's recap of the food!

(click here)

and click here for her post about the cupcakes she made for me. Disclaimer before you read: I have never denied being a little diva sometimes. i am so thankful to my friends, who understand this idiosyncracy of mine and still love me. i love you too.

ok so monday is over. thank GOD.

the crescent moon is beautiful though, did you see it?

sites i like.

note to self: add "sites i like" to the right navi of the blog.

surfing around i found this one... cool pinay! hope she doesn't mind i'm posting this up. i haven't read through all but from the lovely quote and photos, i like.

http://tikayiyay.wordpress.com/

i love my people. this time i mean it sincerely. actually, i always do mean it sincerely. even when some of y'all frustrate the f*ck out of me, i still love you. because i know it's not alllll our fault, the way we are sometimes. our parents, our kababayan, our oppressors, our lovers... i'm not letting them off the hook. but it's still love, unconditional.

"crazy"

so like three of my friends today, when asked, "how's it going?" answered:

"crazy."

so of course i check the astrology forecasts for the day... nothing too bad, but it did say:

Meditate for peace of mind and dig a little deeper into your metaphysical studies. If primary partnerships seem a bit off-kilter, you may be tuning into a Mercury-Juno square from Pisces to Sagittarius (i have no idea what that means either). Pushing your own agenda too far and too fast can boomerang against you. Compassion and sensitivity are warranted when sharing with dear ones. Keep a notebook by your bed to record nocturnal wanderings in the astral realm.

as i googled "lori from the real world" after looking at my kompadre's blog, i find this post:

Crazy Carrie (as in, Bradshaw)

and she makes some good points. i'd go more into my thoughts but i gotta go right now. maybe later. what do you think?

(post) IPT

Party time indeed. It was a blast =) I felt so loved! Thank you to all my friends who came through and blessed the spot with your presence. Homies there from school, work, ex-work, community, "the scene," ...And for bringing new friends! I um, don't remember alll your names because of my inebriated state, but I'm sure we'll meet on the next go-around. Except for Alfie and Melinda's friend Brian. I remember his name because I was still sober when they got there! j.logic, the music was lovely. thank you! and thank you to Genein for taking pics, and making sure my camera didn't get lost =)

click the pic to catch a glimpse...

IPT!!!

my homie michael just hipped me to some vernacular - IPT!!!

I(t's) P(arty) T(ime)!!!

i'm celebrating the blessings of life, love, and happiness tonight....come through!

elevator diaries

it's friday morning and a beautiful day in la. hollywood, to be exact.

a handful of working folks trail into elevator car #2 of our building. it's an interesting lot... we have a cable news network here, a leading entertainment art/design firm, a korean broadcast channel, a medical non-profit, and i think some kind of agency because oftentimes i happen upon ... aspiring audition types LOL. so it's usually an interesting mix of folks in the elevator.

anyways, a handful of working folks trail into elevator #2; me, a construction worker with a tub of concrete, our custodian, a couple of accounting looking people, and a handful of artist/designers, one of them a pretty lady, professional chic with a pooch carrier slung over her shoulder (i think it was paul frank). so it's pretty packed in there right. so the little pooch in the bag got a little startled when the first batch of folks let out, and she barked a little bit.

custodian: hey can you take her out so i can see him?

(mind you there's still like 6 people in this elevator, AND a tub of wet concrete)

chic lady: no. (not like in a mean way like no she won't, more like, no she can't)

custodian: oh, it's cuz she's a girl, huh?

chic lady: (confused) um, yeah i guess?

custodian: (innocently/matter-of-factly) well i don't mean this to sound offensive but (turns to construction guy) usually a dog's personality mimics their owner. if the owner's nice then they're nice

(awkward silence - ok so was he just offensive, or not?)

custodian: like my dog! he eats when i eat, sleeps when i sleep... man he's toootally like me

(kat and accountant start busting up laughing)

chic lady: (confused and a little embarrassed) have a nice day.

my floor is up. i'm out.

...ok maybe you just had to be there.

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!

horoscope for today: mind your business, aries!

Your compassionate nature has helped you create some very strong relationships. But your compassion can sometimes cause you to get upset about problems that are not yours to be upset about. Other peoples' problems are, by definition, theirs! And they need to solve them. You can't get so involved that you suffer sleepless nights! Try letting go: After all, they came to you for guidance and support, not a quick fix. Have faith that things will work out for them in the end. If you don't, you're underestimating the people you care about.

read:
1. keep your nose out of people's bizness damnit!
2. trust that things will turn out fine.

ok friends, if it seems like i don't care today... i don't. jk! i'm here to listen. i'll keep my mouth shut i promise =)

the weekend

just got home from v-town with my parents. we spent easter with my grandmother, Nanay.

we took off late fridnay night, and i pretty much slept the whole way. got there about 5am, and pulled up to they denny's close by. we were the first customers, but the waitress was nowhere to be found. turns out that just minutes before, they got robbed. we left so they could take care of all that.

when we got to Nanay's, we woke her to tell her we were here. she was sooo happy to see us. it was so sweet. even though she can no longer walk nor handa for us, she still asks us if we've eaten, if there's coffee for my dad... always so hospitable. she's progrssed alot since her stroke last year, when we weren't quite sure she was going to make it.

i really just sat still and spent time with my family. no going out like i ususally do when i'm up there. and it was good. spent time with my cousins, got to see my niece and nephew, and my brother. and watch the bruins win! just a good family weekend.

and to top it all offf, my auntie made me leche flan to take home!!! now that's love =) this will be my birthday cake!

have a good week everyone. i think it's gonna be a busy one!

(this was at her birthday in december. luv u 'nay!)

Spring is here!!!

The Sun Moves Into Adventurous Aries!

When the Sun enters Aries you're likely to feel just like the Ram: Ready to charge out into the world! Since Aries is the first sign of the zodiac, it's time for you to make sure you're putting yourself first and considering your own needs. Put some 'spring' into your step as we move into the first day of the Sun in Aries and the Spring Equinox. There's magic in the air -- revel in it! (astrology.com)

i heart spring ... cherry blossoms bloom, and so do pink jasmine... the sun burns off the morning haze quicker... it stays light out longer... my bornday! ... and it's fashionably correct to wear white, and open toe shoes (although living in LA, we can do it year-round)!

So, happy ...

... Persian New Year!
... spring equinox
... first day of the new astrological new year
... sandal shopping!

memory

i joke a lot about getting old, but for real i feel it more difficult to remember things. before i used to memorize everything. to try to combat this, or at least slow down the deterioration of my memory (ew that sounds kinda dramatic huh), every day i try to recall a past memory and remember the details of that event or moment. i don't write them down all the time, but i think i'm going to try to record them from now on.

today was my lolo pol's burial, and i did the eulogy, so last night was a whole bunch of that. reminiscing. it's a trip what you find back there in your memoru.

you'll see in my last post, my reflections about him. here's one that i shared with a friend earlier this week.

today as i reflected i paid attention to the sounds of voices. i was remembering the sound of lolo pol's voice. a tenor voice, with the signature ilocano drawl. if you don't know what i'm talking about, pick up rex navarrete's first cd. he does a good job making fun of it! haha. and then i remember my lola haning's voice. high-pitched. and then my lola's voice. as she got older, her voice got sweeter. she had this giggle, it was so cute. very girly, although she wasn't very "girly." very straight to the point, fiercely independent. i think i want to be like that. mellow with age. smoother. i've seen some old people get bitter, angry, and agitated as they got older. i completely understand why - you see a lot more bullshit! haha. but lola was cool. she was a lot more patient as she got older.

anyways. guess you had to be there =)

this weekend... vegas. hopefully i remember everything that happens! haha.

rest in peace, Lolo Pol.

my great-uncle, Lolo Pol, passed away today at 2:05pm. he was 84 years old.

he was my lola's cousin, and lived next door to my lola and lolo in their duplex for as long as i can remember. since my lolo passed away, he looked after my lola, and checked up on her until her death almost two years ago.

that house in boyle heights was the setting of a big chunk of my childhood memories. if my grandparents were lucy and ricky, lolo pol and his wife, lola haning (who passed away in 2003) were fred and ethel, but instead, ilocano and in east la :)

lolo pol was a handsome, characteristically ilocano man. he looked straight out of fred cordova's archives - smooth, dark skin, salt-&-pepper hair neatly parted on the side, wire rim bifocal glasses. clothing always on point - slacks, v-neck undershirt, button down shirt, lumberjack when it was cold, black leather shoes, and never a wrinkle. he worked at the sears plant in downtown; i remember sitting in the back seat when my uncle or lolo would pick him up from work, though he was usually the one driving around lola and lola haning to run errands.

around my preschool/kindergarten years, and summer of my first years in grade school, my brothers and i spent our time at lolo and lola's house in bh. lolo worked the night shift at county (jail) while my lola worked afternoons at county (hospital). he'd pick us up after his shift, around 7am, feed us, then go to sleep, and then lola would watch us. by noon or so, everyone was up and about. lolo, lola, lolo pol, lola haning, were all cleaning the yard, pruning the plants, tuning up the cars, making repairs around the house, etc. my brothers and i would be outside playing, running around the perimeter of the house, many times in the back, through lolo pol and lola haning's garden.

later on i would find out that their neighbor and good friend, is the grandmother of one of my best friends. we shared memories in that space, before we even knew each other. another reason why that house is special to me.

lolo pol was always a very proper man, quite particular and stern, but always generally a nice man to us kids. he would always ask me how school was, and as i got older, he'd comment on my big earrings, makeup, and manicured nails. i guess sometimes, you'll always be a kid to your elders.

he was the last survivor of that house. his second wife and her son are there now, and a nephew watches my lola's spot. but to me that will always be my grandparents' home. an era's really over for my family.

it's a trip because, i hadn't seen lolo pol in a while. after lola died i just distanced myself from the house. i went to my goddaughter's birthday party on sunday, her aunt asked me about lolo pol. she said how he was so nice, and always fixed things around her mom's house. i just said, "oh he's doing fine." today, i had to send word that he passed away.

i'm sad that he's gone, but not heartbroken. i'm happy that he's passed on, and not in pain. he lived a full life so it's easy to accept that he had to go. and now he's joined his original crew in the spirit world. he was always very diligent in prayer, so i'm sure the big G looked out for him :)

rest in peace, lolo pol. thank you for your presence in my life.

I Love My Peoples!

So i just got back from the DMV. And i must say, this was the most pleasant DMV experience i have had in my entire life! it took all of 10 minutes. (the trick: make an appointment in the mid-morning or mid-afternoon. stay away from lunchtime!) not only was it short and pleasant, but HELLA funny. check this out.

i walk in, stand in a short line under the "start here" sign. in front of me is a 40ish filipino man, about 5'8", thin, mid-length wavy hair, a la every pinoy's favorite karaoke icon, neil diamond. dark eyes, dark hair, and i smile - i kid you not - like the JOKER. he has to get his license renewed as well. cool.

by the time i read the eye chart, pay my $28, and reach the far left corner of the office to take my picture, boyet (made that up) is right in front of me, taking his photo.

boyet : ok, make my picture good. i don't want to come back and take another one.

dmv guy (does a double take): ok sir.

boyet poses.

dmv guy: sir, can you close your mouth?

boyet: i want to smile! why cannot i smile in my driver's license!

dmv guy (realizing that he was in fact, smiling, and not just opening his mouth): oh, i'm sorry sir. of course you can smile.

dmv guy snaps photo.

boyet (walks over): let me see it. is it good?

dmv guy: no, you blinked. let's take another one.

boyet (perturbed): gees, what a waste of a good smile.

dmv guy's face: [oh my god are you KIDDING ME?!]

dmv guy takes picture, boyet takes another look, and thumbs up. done.

boyet: thank you very much.

dmv guy: thank you sir. next!

***

ok, maybe you had to be there.

sunday serene.

i ache for this kind of day, especially lately. no to-do list to complete, or places i need to be. actually, i really did need to spend time with my parents, as i was beginning to miss them, and my usual weekly visits with them have been less frequent since the holidays. we went to church, had some dim-sum, and took a nap.

totally BORING for blog content. (for far more interesting content please see my komadre's site. she ROX!) but in this world where it seems the pace gets faster every day and our tech-driven culture aims to grab every millisecond bit of our attention...

...i've been feeling lately (a longer "lately" than i prefer) that i'm just trying to keep up, stay on top, and get ahead...
...i've also been feeling that i'm not doing so great with some of my responsibilities to others (especially those i love), to my goals, and to the future...

i just ache for this kind of day. where i can reflect about some things, and let some tension and anxiety about the aforementioned feelings dissipate a little bit, and hopefully give space to some answers and solutions.

there is truly something amazing about "the grind," "the process," and "making it happen" - i've enjoyed the highs that my endeavours in these realms have brought me thus far. but sometimes it's just nice to have some time like this.

I gotta see what's up before it gets me down....

yesterday.

was kinda in a funk. morning had good energy, with the sun warming up the city. but i dunno just one of those days where i was on some uugh whatevers. nothing was 'right.' again with the... 'what is my purpose and what am i doing with my life' ish. as one of my good friends would say, "would you like some cheese with that whine?" lol.

dailyom's message for the day: ....if complaining has become a huge part of our identities, it may be time to take a good look at how we are spending our energy.

basically telling my ass to shut the hell up already. it's all really not that serious.

pulled in a bit of a late day at work, and then went to the COMMON show at hob. the late show. yes i did complain that it was late. that i'm getting old and can't hang. my feet hurt (breaking in some new cute shoes). that there was traffic. and no parking. well, $30 parking (wtf tho, right?!) and obnoxious frat boys.

earlier that evening ana and i reminisced about how we used to be so active, angry, we hustled, we didn't let sh*t get to us. we let people have it! what happened to our dreams ... like mine of opening a performance space/office/gallery/storefront. lol. read: more complaining.

when we got situated, and Com came on, finally the lesson of the day hit me. here i was, out with the homegirls, enjoying some good music and good times. even though i've seen him i think about 10 times, Common is still special because, in addition to his skill as an MC and performer, I admire his growth as a quality artist over the years. Didn't succumb to violent or misogynist hip hop. Didn't leave hip hop behind in his quest for other things. Also brought him to my campus in my undergrad days. My ex group opened for him, and that was special to witness too.

no more complaining. it was a great show. in addition to his string of dope songs... i was particularly happy to hear "drivin me wild" live, amongst the other good ditties.

busta rhymes and mr. misunderstood kanye made appearances. kanye did 3 songs. nice =)

***

today.

dailyom:

Small Steps To Big Change
Making Big Change Easier

Sometimes the goals we set for ourselves are merely indicators of the need for change and are useful in getting us moving in the right direction. But it is possible that once we try out what seemed so ideal, we may find that it doesn’t actually suit us, or make us feel the way we had hoped. ...Taking small steps forward gives us time to adjust and find secure footing on our new path.

Life doesn't always give us the opportunity to anticipate or prepare for a big change, and we may find ourselves overwhelmed by what is in front of us. By choosing one thing to work on at a time, we focus our attention on something manageable, and eventually we will look up to see that we have accomplished quite a bit. Forcing change is, in essence, a sign that we do not trust the universe’s wisdom.

i have to remember small steps are ok. sometimes i belittle my "issues" because i don't see them as "as big" as what others got going on - kids, marriage, mortgage, health, etc. i have to remember not to compare my ish with someone else's, rather to respect that this is what the universe gave me, so i must follow suit. just me, no one else. even if they keep knocking at my door, calling my phone, emailing, im'ing, texting... i'll get to you don't trip. just let me get there. i tend to concern myself with what other's think, to a fault sometimes. and then get all anxious, and freeze up...

ok. need to stop all that. break's over.

mardi gras!

fat tuesday. the day before catholics start behaving for 40 days. ha.

i was in new orleans a few weeks back, vacationing and visiting my best friend. just so happened it was the first day of mardi gras celebrations.

4pm: k. and i just about to take the streetcar (named desire, haha) into the Quarter. residents are very happy that the streetcar is back.

5pm: pre-party dinner at the Gumbo Shop. i had the gumbo, k. had the po'boy. all topped off with some hot spiced rum. mmmmmm... warm the belly topped with a nice buzz.

6:30pm: the parade!

8:30pm-ish: check out my beads! it was 30 degrees, hence the puffy jacket. no flashing boobies. that's tacky.

...9pm...ish...til the end of the night...haaaaappppyyy mmmaaaardiii graaaaa!

i was in bed before 1am. but hey, we started early too!

more nola pics later. so much more to this city than just mardi gras. ok, lent started 4 minutes ago. g'night!

breathe. b-r-e-a-t-h....e. breathe.

i was just introduced as a new hire at the company-wide meeting. in my introduction, they asked me the james lipton question. after being up until about 1:30am the previous evening finishing up season 4 and starting season 5 of my new favorite show (see previous post), the question surely jump-started my brain at 6:25am pacific.

"what is your favorite word and why?"

...

one that comes to mind is "breathe."

when i was in 6th grade, i participated in a spelling bee, that consisted of other catholic grammar schools in the area. i kinda studied for it, and i didn't realize until i got there, that i pretty much memorized the word list.

the word that came up was, breathe. in that moment a sharp stab of panic struck me, because breathe was not on the word list! only "breath" was! WTF why did she read the word breathe???

ok so i had two options - go with the answer i knew was wrong, but was on the word list, or, go with the right answer.

"breathe. b-r-e-a-t-h....e. breathe."

there was a slight hesitation from the moderator, because she meant to read, "breath"! in those 3-5 seconds that seemed like an eternity, i was already planning to walk straight to my teacher and challenge the decision if they said it was incorrect.

"correct."

whew. whewwwwwwwwww.

i went on to win the spelling bee. it was pretty cool. i did a couple more, and then retired my crown, undefeated. LOL. ok ok. i graduated and had to go to 9th grade. i remember thinking, if i could get a job spelling, i would be set. haha.

breathe is also a favorite word, because it's the first word i "tell" myself, usually without even uttering it, to unlock a stuck thought or situation. to open up another world of options and possibility.

have a super tuesday.

don't bother me right now i'm watching...

The Wire Season 4. I inhaled Season 3 this weekend and OMG loved it. So far so good, but I miss Avon already! LOL. I should be done by week's end, and caught up to Season 5.

Yes, I slept on it. yay for dvds. and bigger yay for bff's who lend dvd's to watch! (thanks kdc!)

Vacation photos up soon. I probably care more than you do! =)

Ok back to the regularly scheduled program.

new realms to roam for the weekday days.

ok so, in light of one of my resolutions to live a well balanced life, i'm going to try to not really talk about the jobbie job since that will already take up the majority of my waking hours. and i signed a confidentiality agreement. and if you're not in my industry you might find it boring. but who cares about what you think :)

i started the new gig this week. thankfully it hasn't been super busy, so i've been able to settle in at a nice pace. with everything still so new, i am officially out of my comfort zone. but that's a good thing, essentially, so i can reach out, stretch my out my paws, and expand my world. the pace will surely pick up, before i know it. i admit, i dig fast pace stuff. but i did hit my bottom on the workaholic tip, so i welcome the 'detox' time. shoot who knows, it may be gone tomorrow. (but geez i hope it can wait til monday!)

check it out - the view from my office window:

"...the city she loves me...."

to be greeted everyday, with the sight of one of my core inspirations ... breathtaking. love it! mee-yeow!

i'm in the hollywood area, homies. let's watch a movie, dig for music, or share some chow.

***

vacation recap up soon.

meow.

so i had a blog some years ago, but i couldn't for the life of me figure out how to log back into it. old email addy, forgotten password, etc. so here i am, new blog. let's see if i can keep it up this time :)

i'm currently in new orleans visiting my best friend. i was about to put up photos of my trip so far, but now, i'm sleepy. so you'll just have to wait.

mardi gras' first parade is tomorrow. i'm pretty excited, this is such a beautiful city. easily one of my favorites. the food is amazing!

best friend's chihuahua loves me, despite my felineness. see we all can get along.

more later. tulog na ako.